lamia_prime | (no subject)

Well, boss is back from vacation - I can tell because his cooze g/f is in the office being beyond useless and utterly helpless.

He'd bought me a new printer, and took my printer into the back for his cooze g/f, er, I mean bookkeeper, as her printer was noisy and clonky. I hated HATED the new printer - it slowed up my system, constantly tried to update itself online, made a shrill SKWEEEEE noise before it printed, and took as long to prep and print as the last one did just to print. Frankly, I don't need a machine that prints stupid-fast, I just need one that works. So before boss left on vacation, he asked if I would be keeping the new printer or switching them, and I said switching. No worries, and off he went.

While he was away, I switched the printers, and now my system is back up to speed, and it's all good. The Drama Llama keeps all of the CDs, manuals, and related stuff in his office, and it's understood that it's off-limits because he is a control freak. All good.

Cooze g/f shows up today (what a disagreeable surprise) to do the invoicing because one client MUST HAVE THEIR INVOICE BY TODAY OR THE WORLD ENDS. Uh, well, actually, I sent them an invoice last week, and while today MAY be the deadline as far as YOU are concerned, the client told ME last week that he needed it no later than Friday, so it's been done.

Well, cooze g/f can't do ANYTHING because the printer isn't hooked up, so boss will just have to "get his little tush down to the office and set it up for her".

Becuase I hadn't set it up for her, see, and the printer wasn't connected to the tower, see, and waaaaaaaah.

Naturally, I get a phone call, and explain slowly and patiently that yes, while I HAD run a test page on the printer when it was hooked up in the other office and everything worked fine, in the interim I had switched printers, LIKE I TOLD HIM I WAS GOING TO, and, since I don't have access to the tech warehouse that is his credenza, he'd have to tell me where the CD was so that helpless cooze could print.

"Oh." he said. And told me where the CD was. So I grabbed the relevant CD, and put it next to her (where she was playing solitaire after telling the Llama that she'd be doing the time) and told her that she would need to upload that info.

So she inserts the CD and then informs me that I "will have to get her the manual because she can't find a model number anywhere and (now that I am stepping foot into her office to point out the model on the FRONT OF THE PRINTER CASING) .... oh there it is." So I go back to my desk.

And now I'm going going to have to figure THIS part out for her because she can't connect to the internet on this computer and her options are all related to online updating and.... so I click on the "Ignore" button and walk out of her office again.

Meesa soooooo helpless.....

*SLAP*

The really sad part is that when she is dumber than a bag of hammers, she doesn't even have the grace to be embarassed, she's just angry that she was unable to have the info handed to her on a silver plate. Like the time that she bitched Llama out in front of me because she couldn't figure out which account this payment was supposed to go to, and it was more than onr account and more than the other and oh she HATED it when Llama makes two accounts for one client because how is she supposed to know WHICH account gets the $3K credit???

Oh, apparently she's unable to make the new printer work, and has reattached the old one. Guess who will have to make it work (probably by flicking one switch)?

Man, it scares the poo out of me that I am the IT for this office LMFAO

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EDIT/UPDATE

She couldn't make the new printer work. She coudln't make the old printer work when she plugged it back in. She ended up yelling and banging the desk and practically in tears because SHE had only 3 hours to do this and SHE had a real job and only the Llama would put in a new printer right before billing was to be done and stormed out (after nearly leaving his checkbook on her desk, and I kindly handed it to her) saying that he could call her when the printer was hooked up.

She didn't actually put any of the information into the machine, just played solitaire and whined and yelled.

She claimed that it uninstalled itself (uh huh - you just were too impatient in the install process) and I got it up and working no problems. You have to WAIT during the install process, you dumb cunt.

The issue with her old printer not working when she tried again was that she hadn't plugged the plug in all the way....

Guess who got to do the invoices entirely by hand?

Naturally, I got yelled at, and I pointed out that if I had KNOWN that she would be unable to install a CD I would have done it before he left for vacation, and not presumed that she would be capable of taking care of it herself, what WAS I thinking?

She is quite the piece of work, mywordyes. And he still thinks that she doens't dye her hair. LMFAO